“Self pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in the world” – Helen Keller. In the world of today, mostly heartless with much to fear, it becomes really easy to get boggled down with the burden. It is at these times that we fall into a mode of self pity and leave behind what once made us a person with a grip on life. It is at these very times that our sound decision making capabilities are compromised as we think about everything but can’t associate any good to any of it. What’s worse is, just one failure can lead up to this condition from which getting out seems near impossible. If you too feel that way and if ever trust has been your companion, get back together with it, because it only 'seems' impossible. All it requires you to do is take one step, and the walk towards attaining what you lost on will follow automatically. So walk towards the stairs by reading what we have in store for you, and take the first step towards boosting up your self esteem.
Boosting Self Esteem
I, Me, Myself
The first step in boosting up self esteem is by way of exploring your own mindset about nobody else but you. Yes, remove any feelings of negativity or self doubt that you have against yourself. If you think you’re not good at something, admit it and try to better it rather than constantly bitching about your own self as to “why the hell can’t I do it” or “why am I like this”. Stop blaming yourself and honor yourself for what you are, but call spade a spade and not a club. Be at peace with yourself, only then can you be at peace with the world.
In Sync with the World
After you’ve taken care of yourself, take care of the world. That is not to say that you should behave like a Godfather or Godmother. Rather, the way you’ve accepted the bad and appreciated the good in you; do the same for your chums and the hoi polloi out there. Free yourself from all the negativity that you have for others. If you must talk about them, talk positive and praise rather than blaming or degrading their character. By doing so you’re only doing harm to your own. Remember that you are worth being a better person than being just a backstabber or gossiper.
Tend Well to Criticism
Have ears for criticism but don’t have a heart for it. For some people, blaming and criticizing others for their drawbacks is the only way to get high. They do this not so that you can become a better person, but so that they can curtain their own dark side with which they don’t want to deal. Their only purpose is to bring others down. However, be all ears to any advice given by your loved ones and people for whom you have immense respect as it is their words of caution and criticism that will help make a better person out of yourself.
Positive self affirmations are one great way for building up self esteem. They are short and positive one line statements, generally written by the person who recites them at regular intervals or whenever he/she feels negativity spoiling up the scene. These statements are intended to make him/her feed a little positivity into the system. Once you get used to their way of working, you’ll feel them conjuring up a whole new atmosphere filled with hope and strong self belief that will guide you for the times to come. Statements like “I have faith in my abilities”, “I’m going to have a good day today”, “I love myself and that heals my life” etc are a good way to actually bring some positive healing into your life, followed by improved self esteem.
Dress and Carry
Doesn’t matter how many people and whatever number of times “outward appearances don’t matter" is alleged; the crux of the matter is that they sometimes really do. Although this won’t actually make you the person you want to be or what people expect you to be, it will certainly help you feel better about yourself, and that is what you are aiming for in the first place. If you don’t have already, buy clothes that you think look good on you. To add to this 'feel good' factor, try carrying yourself in a confident and enthusiastic way. Improve on your posture if you feel or others have told you that it looks tired and slouchy. A good body posture while sitting, standing, and walking will definitely help you gain in on that self esteem you’re looking for.
Exercise and Meditate
Exercising and meditating are called recreational activities for a reason; they help recreate the person you have been to what you want to be. However, it’s very important to choose an exercise that you love doing rather than forcing yourself into it. Gyming, walking, jogging, swimming, cycling, aerobics, dancing etc are all included in exercising; select the best according to your liking. Also, meditating daily on a regular basis and at irregular times when you suddenly feel the urge to be comforted by the spiritual touch is good way to reclaim some of the self esteem. Doing yoga, reading scripture, and indulging in exercises are a good way to keep the positive energies flowing.
In the midst of all this, don’t forget to celebrate small successes, don’t forget to have a sense of humor, don’t forget to contribute to other’s happiness, and don’t forget to express your gratitude towards anything or anyone who did you good. Boosting up the morale of the people around you is the key to boosting up self esteem.